Short jokes
People say towers can't move. Apparently, nobody told that to the Trade Centers.
Would love to pound Sterling with a 14 lb hammer.
What 16 stoner rode a Derby winner?
Lester Piggott's.
"Mmmmmmmm, daddy, f*ck me harder. I love you, daddy, mmmm. I luv your cock, mmmm, lick me, lick my clit, daddy!"
Eli is hot.
My arms are just a different texture pack compared to my body.
"We can't go under... We can't go over... Oh no, we got to go through it!"
What should you do after banging the tightest pussy?..
Just put the diaper on her 😉
What do you call a group of kangaroos? Gangaroos.
What do you get when you cross a pig with a cactus? A porkupine!
Me: What's the difference between me and my grandpa?
Friends: What?
Me: I've been alive for the past 14 years.
We sped up the cycle of life and death, we gave Eric and Dylan a shortcut.
On a scale of 1-10, how old was Michael Jackson’s last boyfriend?
I went 80 mph in a school zone and one of the speed bumps screamed, "Am I hallucinating?"
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don’t know where home is.
Why is there a hole in Uranus?
Do you know how to make 4 Albanians stand on a shoebox?
Just tell them that it floats.
What is the favorite dish in Africa? The empty one.
I asked an American if their national anthem was "Pumped Up Kicks."
Today I am finding out the lore of worstjokesever.com.