Short jokes
What did one chair say to the other?
"I'm so bummed out!"
Your friend lost his left arm, and after getting out of the hospital, you ask him if he’s OK. He says, "Yeah, I’m all RIGHT."
The potholes so big in Oklahoma Can make a whole garden.
Roads be so rough in Oklahoma, I saw a high lifted truck get ended riding lower than a Hot Wheels car.
Morbius was awesome, and the Batman sucked.
"Butter, butter, and butter, please, please bring me butter."
I'd tell you a 9/11 joke, but it'd fly over your head and into the Twin Towers.
Doctor: I will deliver the baby right away.
Dad: I would like the baby to have a liver.
What do you call grass that grows in space?
Astro-turf.
What's a Fortnite player's favorite era? The 90s!
My dad went to go get milk. He came back 7 years later, and we had to send him back because he got the wrong milk.
What do you call a dead baby?
Spawn killed.
What do Bob Ross's painting and the orphanage have in common?
They're both filled with happy little accidents.
Anyone want to fuck? Cause my sisters are such cunts!
A virgin is what I called my daughter before I took that away from her.
When someone said to an orphan, "My boyfriend ghosted me," the orphan says back, "Don't worry, my parents ghosted me!" 🤣
When a homeless kid goes to school and the teacher says, "You have homework tonight," he said, "Sorry, Teach, I don't got a home."
What did the teacher say when he raped his naughty student?
"Face the wall!"
It looks like Will Smith slapped your hairline so hard that the dinosaurs can see it now.
Niall Devine, clown.