Shark jokes
People are like sharks; only the great ones are white.
Hello, if you don't know me (which you probably don't), my name is watersharky, or WS, or Shark.
I am a normal, weird kid/preteen, and that's it. If you want more info on me, I will gladly share! Shark out.
What does a shark smoke? Sea-weed.
How do whales breathe underwater? They take a deep meth.
Humans and sharks have something in common: the great ones are always white.
Why couldn't the GREAT WHITE beat the HAMMERHEAD?
because the GREAT WHITE kept getting BONKED on the HEAD by the HAMMERHEAD!
What do you call the mushy stuff between sharks' teeth?
A slow swimmer...
I have a friend who recently stopped smoking, and the withdrawal was causing hallucination. He went to my house and thought there was a shark in the pond in my backyard. So, I would like to dedicate these lyrics to my friend: "I see a dreamer over there by the water!"
What is a shark’s favorite TV show? Sea-S-I.
So there was this guy who went swimming one day and got his left side bitten off by a shark.
But don't worry, he is all right now.
Baby Shark be like, "It's the END," bruh, they dead.
Why did my mother buy me a Honda? She knows I can't move, so she pushed my wheelchair with me in it into the ocean. I survived just by a second, but a shark got my wheelchair, fucking bitch.
How did the shark do on his math test?
Jawesome!
What is shark's favorite day?
Chewsday.
How are shark eggs and your mom the same? They're both the biggest thing ever laid.
A lawyer bought a beautiful yacht. He invited the law firm to come aboard for a great weekend.
Saturday night was the candle light dinner and Sam drank too much, walked on the deck and fell over the rail into the water and was calling for help. Tom said, "Oh no, the sharks will get him." All of the party lined along the rail and noticed the sharks were swimming around him in a circle. Jim said, "The sharks are not even bothering him!" And a shark lifted up his head out of the water and said, "Professional Courtesy."
Why did the shark spit out the clown?
Because he tasted funny!
What do you get when you cross a shark and a snowman?
Frostbite!
Did you hear about the shark that ate a key shop?
I think it got lockjaw after that.
[God creating sharks]
God: Ok give them 3 rows of teeth.
Angel: Seems excessive but ok.
God: And make them mean as hell.
Angel: WTF y.
God: BECAUSSE I SAID SO.
Angel:...
God: And make one of the types have a hammer for a head.
Angel: Why do I still work for you?
God: Because I’m the only employer as of right now.
What did the shark say after he ate the clownfish?
"This taste a little funny."