Shark

Shark Jokes

White

What do sharks and people have in common? The great ones are white.

Seal

What did the seal say to the shark?

"Are you seal-iously going to eat me?"

Movie

If you play the movie "Jaws" in reverse, it's a heartwarming story about a shark who gives arms and legs to disabled people.

Baby Shark

"Herishy, me lava u, why did u leave mee? Wahh wahh baby sharka, doodle do to to babyyy cutie pie..."

Ocean

Q: Why did baby shark cross the Pacific Ocean?

A: To find his dad.

This had me wheezing ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿคฃ

Pirate

Two pirates, Morty and Sol, meet in a bar. Sol has a patch over one eye, a hook for a hand, and a wooden peg leg. โ€œYe gads, matey,โ€ says Morty. โ€œWhat happened to ya?โ€ Sol says, โ€œMe pirate ship was attacked, and a lucky shot lopped off me leg. So now I got me a wooden peg.โ€

โ€œAnd yer hand?โ€ asks Marty.

โ€œWhen me ship sank, a shark bit me hand off. So now I got me a hook.โ€

โ€œOK, but whatโ€™s with the eye patch?โ€

โ€œI was standinโ€™ on a dock, and the biggest seagull I ever saw poops right in me eye.โ€

โ€œBut ya donโ€™t go blind from no seagull poop.โ€

โ€œTrue,โ€ says Sol. โ€œBut it was me first day with the hook.โ€

Blood

Guys, I'm back...

Here's my joke:

What is blue and red all over?

Blood in the water of a shark attack victim.

Bike

A shark can swim faster than me, but I can run faster than a shark.

So in a triathlon, it would all come down to whoever can ride a bike the fastest.

Job loss

A fully grown bull Great White Shark is 15 feet long and can open its jaws up to 1.2 meters long. It could eat a small child in seconds. Anyways, I lost my job at the aquarium...

People

If you watch Jaws backwards, it's a heartwarming story about a shark that gives arms and legs to disabled people.

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  • Name

    Okay, I'm on my last nerve when people say "Water Shark Guy" and other things THAT ARE NOT MY NAME.

    This is my name: watersharky!