Self-esteem jokes
He: "I love you."
Me: "I love myself too."
If I had a dollar for every girl that found me unattractive, girls would find me attractive.
I cry when you leave the room. They're tears of joy because you have an ugly hairline.
Once I asked Siri to tell me a joke, and it asked me, "What is the difference between a large pizza and you?" One can feed a family.
You look like you're playing hide-and-seek with your hairline.
Your hairline is so hideous that Derrick White's hairline envies yours.
If I had a face like yours, I would sue my parents.
Wanna hear a joke? Just look in the mirror, the joke's there!
Yo, hairline is as accurate as my jump shot.
I've got not much of anything to be honest.
Been in special classes in school.
Not liked by people.
Only relationship I've ever had and she cheated on me.
31 years old and never had sex, pathetic.
Not very smart.
Don't look good.
Hate myself more than anything.
Been a failure at everything in life.
Probably be alone forever.
People treat me like crap.
Can't do anything right.
And the list goes on and on.
So the question is why haven't I killed myself yet? The answer is, I forget. I'm a extreme procrastinator, keep just putting it off because I'll probably just fuck it up anyway.
Why did the woman feel ugly?
A. Nobody would even rape her.
You need to eat makeup on the inside because, friend, you're so ugly and you're not even pretty on the outside.
Even the World Trade Center underwent a better upgrade than your ugly ass.
Why don't you have a life?
Because you're ugly.
If I wanted to kill myself, I would just climb up your ego and jump down to your IQ.
Your hairline.
Don't ever say your life is a joke because jokes are actually funny.
The trip from your eyebrow to your hairline costs $6000.
You're so ugly your hairline ran away!
Your hairline retreats from your face just like all the guys that look at you.