Scream Jokes

whats red and screams when you shake it? a skinned baby in a bag of salt

Lil Timmy and Lil Susie are taking a bath together. Lil Susie looks down and says, "hey what's that?" Lil Timmy looks down and says, "oh that, that's only my little red race car." They continue on with their bath.

Then Lil Timmy looks down and says, "hey what's that?" Lil Susie looks down and says, "oh that, that's only my little red race car garage." They continue with their bath. Then Lil Susie says, "hey, what if we try to put your little red race car in my little red race car garage."

The parents downstairs then hear a bloody scream. They rush upstairs and then say, "what's wrong?" Lil Susie says, "well Lil Timmy tried to put his little red race car in my little red race car garage but the back wheels wouldn't fit so we cut them off."

I love fire. My friends love it too. When i set them on fire, they run around and scream. They sometimes get so tired they immediately fall asleep forever. Also, they need a shower.

When your going 80KM in a school zone and one of the speed bumps scream.

Why can’t a orphan have sex?

Because they can’t scream daddy!

What's the difference between a baby and an onion?

One screams when I peel it's skin off.

I screamed janga today when watching the 9/11 documentary

I bought a silencer for my gun, but I don't think it works. My victims still scream.

Roses are red, life has no meaning, voices in my head, are constantly screaming.

i saw a kid in a wheelchair and i screamed EXTREME PARKOUR!!!!!!!!!!!!

imagine if the kid in a wheelchair was in fast and furious his wheelchair is the only one that keeps him going

Are you a ghost train? Because I am going to scream when I ride you.

I was taking my dog on a long walk when I heard a loud scream. I ran towards the sound. There I found Penaldo sinking in a pit of mud. I was trying to help him out when my dog said "Leave him, he's been in the mud for years". I walked away shocked but not surprised

A man woke up from a serious surgery. He screamed, "Doctor! Doctor! I can't feel my legs!". And the doctor replied, "I know. I amputated you arms."

What looks like peanut butter and jelly,and makes a woman scream? Afterbirth

You go up to a bar and say hi he doesn’t look at you you keep saying hi he says what then you realize that he is the one that u stole his lady from but then he doesn’t give you any drink you say why he screams at you and then says YOUR FIVE

WHAT MUSIC SCARES BALOONS? POP MUSIC

WHY WOULD THE BANNANA SCREAM OUTCH BECAUSE GETTING PEALED

An older retired couple - the wife had grown tired of her husband farting in bed each night. One morning she put some chicken parts under the blankets in bed next to him and went off to make some coffee, A few minutes later she hears a loud fart followed by a blood curdling scream. He comes out after awhile and says, "Hon, you were right that I would fart my guts out. Took me the longest to put them back in".