Science jokes
Why was the noble gas not emo?
Because they were thinking RIGHT.
The water in the shower evaporates before it reaches you.
Why is NASA so sus?
'Cause they wanted to see Uranus.
So, Dad is teaching his 8-year-old son about the planets and said, "This is Uranus." Then the 5-year-old son says, "Where is my anus?"
Why is the ocean blue?
A: Because the fish go, "blu-blu."
Is George gay...? Stephen Hawking approves.
Why is the sun so mean? Because it keeps ROASTING everyone!
I wish we could implant all parts because I could have used some car parts from Stephen Hawking after he died.
If you execute someone in ventricular fibrillation in the electric chair, will they come back to life once and then die?
Have you ever walked past Stephen Hawking's house?
No, well neither has he.
Stephen Hawking died because his screw fell out.
According to scientists, there has been a discovery of water on Mars.
Mars-1
Africa-0
Why haven't they put Stephen Hawking in charge yet?
On one hand he was fantastic and the other a spastic. You could say he was a fantastic spastic.
What color is Stephen Hawking's house?
It's a bungalow.
What does E.T. stand for? Because he has little legs.
What does S.H. stand for? He doesn't.
What does S.H. stand for? Shit happens.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Stephen.
Can't you read? It says "No Hawking."
Stephen Hawking's best subjects were Physics and Maths. His worst was P.E.
Knock knock. Who's there? Stephen Hawking. Wheelie?
Knock knock.
Who's there?
It's me. I can't get in because Stephen Hawking is in the way.