Science jokes
Why did Stephen Hawking die? He couldn't log in.
NASA stands for "Nobody asks scientists anymore."
A farmer artificially impregnated a cow. The cow said to another cow, "It's a miracle, I'm pregnant." The other cow said, "That's impossible, it's only us cows in the field, you must be joking." The first cow said, "Nope, I'm serious... no bull!"
What did George Washington Carver have anything to do with gorillas? It's a little possible, ya dummy!
(Kids Doing A Science Project.) Kid 1: Did you bring Uranus?
Kid 2: Never leave home without it.
73 Earths can fit in Uranus.
Don't trust atoms, people, they make up everything!
What did the boy say to his brother at chemistry class?
"Hey BrO!"
Yo mama is so fat that she is not wrong when she says the world revolves around her.
What do you call a thirsty girl?
An H2Hoe.
Why is Mercury filled with Beryllium, Gold, and Titanium?
Mercury is Be-Au-Ti-Full!
An acronym for penis is Proton-enhanced nuclear induction spectroscopy. So just remember, the word "nuclear" is part of a penis.
Yo mama so fat that when she was on the moon, she had it sent right into the abyss of outer space.
What’s the difference between a dog and a marine biologist?
One wags its tail, and the other tags a whale!
Engineer: I know engineering, and my gut instinct tells me to fix it!
Biologist: I know biology, and your gut instinct is full of shit.
SCP-173 has breached containment. This is not a joke. Multiple Keter class SCPs have breached containment. This is an XK class event. Evacuate the Earth and solar system. The world is ending!
What kind of candy do astronauts eat in space?
Mars bars.
What did the atom say to the other atom?
"Did you see the new Tron movie?"
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Atoms are small, But so are you!
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite food? Meals on wheels.