Whats the difference between a school in Pakistan and an Al Qaeda base?
Not too sure. I just fly the drone.
Cheap oil, no immigration, and no school shootings.
Corona did what Trump promised.
Voting is like doing a group project in school.
I did my part, but I’m worried the rest of you are going to fuck this up.
Son to mother: "Mom, all the kids in the school are making fun of me because I am still a virgin."
Mother: "Well, start giving them bad grades, and they will stop."
Q: Why do Americans fish with guns?
A: To shoot up the whole school
When the teacher gives me an F on my exam,
but I have an AK-47 in my backpack.
*Is honestly the best policy.*
Seeing one of her students making faces at others in the playground, Mrs. Matthews stopped to gently reprove the child. Smiling sweetly, the teacher said, "When I was a child, I was told if I made ugly faces I would stay like that."
The student looked up and replied, "Well, you can’t say you weren’t warned, Mrs. Matthews!"
My biology teacher told us "get out nice and sharp colored pencils." Does she mean as sharp as in the blades I use to cut myself?
The teacher made us present a slideshow to introduce ourselves.
Mine is bright and colorful with music. It was so good that a kid started dancing!
Why did the math book kill itself?
It had too many problems.
The depressed kid walked into the counselor's office.
"I'm feeling like killing myself," he said.
"Oh no! Don't worry, sweetie, just hang in there!," the counselor responded.
There was a solar eclipse at school and we missed it, but it was alright. Your mum went to NASA and recreated it herself.
What happens when the orphan at school gets sent home?
Why do Asians excel at math?
Because their dog can never eat their homework.
I got kicked out of flight school, so I decided to learn from the experienced pilots (Isis).
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are all in the 9th grade. Which one is the sexiest?
The blonde, because she’s the only one who’s 18.
Bin Laden’s kid comes sad from school.
“Dad, I got an F in Geography class!”
“Why is that?”
“The teacher asked me what’s the tallest building in New York and I said ‘Empire State Building.’”
Bin Laden waits a moment and then replies, “Let dad handle this one.”
What’s the worst thing about being suicidal?
The school shooter will always spare you.
One way to not pick up a girl is to say, “Are you an American school because I wanna shoot kids into you?” I tried it on a girl, and she is now terrified to come near me.
How was I supposed to know she was already pregnant?
I was once playing the bottle flip challenge on the school table with my friend, and when it was his turn, the bottle fell to his eggplant! 😱😂
