What did the baby cow say to the mommy cow when he saw a hamburger?
"Mommy, is that Uncle Joe?"
Say Jokes
What did one shoe say to the other shoe when they were fighting?
I wanna sock you in the eye so bad!
What did the dime say to the penny? At least I have more cents than you.
What did the processor say when it was being overclocked?
"Stop it! It hertz so much!"
How do you say "Brazier" in German?
Stop 'em from floppin' (German accent)
Two wind turbines were standing on a hill.
One asks, "What's your favorite type of music?"
The other one says, "I'm a big metal fan."
Imagine getting a call and it says, "Welcome to David's orphanage. You make them, we take them. How may we help you?"
What did the orphan say to the other? "Quickly Robin, to the Batmobile!"
How do you spell ihop?
Then spell ihop and say "ness".
what did the suicidal kid say to the tree?
don't leave me hanging.
People say that biting off your finger would be as easy as biting a carrot if your brain didn't try to stop you. How the f do people know that and how many people's fingers did they bite off before coming to that conclusion?
What did the orphan say to the other orphan?
"Get into the Batmobile, Robin."
I'm not saying you're ugly, but you're the reason God created miscarriages!
I still remember the last thing my grandfather said before kicking the bucket: "Hey, wanna see how far I can kick this bucket?"
What did the grim reaper say when his favorite car commercial came on? "Safe life repair, safe life replace!"
What did the short Chinese man say when he was called a dwarf? "Da fok yu sai tu meee."
A man walks into a bar and says, "I'm feeling depressed. What do you have to cheer me up?"
The bartender replied: "A shotgun."
What do you say when you see your TV floating away at night?
"Drop it, Jamal!"
So today I heard a friend say she had a stalker. I can confirm I've never seen a stalker following her.
My mum once told me, "How do you spell Mississippi?" and I said, "Misisipi." But she said, "No, it goes mi-ss-i-ss-pp-i," and I laughed when she said "pp." Then she said, "Why are you laughing?" I tried saying, "You said pp," but I was laughing too hard.
