Say jokes
Why do New Yorkers get what Spider-Man is saying?
Because he always makes spider-sense.
What did the Pokemon lover say when he got to the shoe store?
I have to Pikashoe.
Have you heard the saying, "One man's trash is another man's treasure"? Great saying.
Not so great way to find out you are adopted.
The boyfriend says to the explosive dude: "You're the bomb!" The explosive dude says: "Wow, that was Whitty."
Just saying this, but I hate how many little kids there are on this site, and when they post, they have the worst posts about "sex", so I'm just saying how they act immature.
What did Saturn say to Uranus? Hi.
What did the fish say when he swam into a wall?
Nothing, because fish can't talk.
What did the green grape say to the purple grape?
"Breathe... Breathe..."
Mom: They say our kid neighbor has blue blood.
Son: Really?
Also 2 hours later:
Son: Mom, the kid doesn't have blue blood.
Mom: Son, I-
What did grandpa say before he died in the hospital bed?
"Boy, could you put my phone on charging?"
Women have eggs and milk in them...
And they say that they don't belong in the kitchen.
The poacher agrees but says that his assistant is ill and will need the man to come with him in his assistant's place. The man agrees, and so the poacher goes out to the jungle with the man.
The poacher brings a pair of handcuffs, a long stick, a shotgun, and a dog. They search through the jungle for about an hour and then spot a male gorilla above in the treetops.
The man asks the poacher what the plan is. The poacher replies, "I'm going to climb the tree and, when I get close enough, I'm going to start poking the gorilla with the stick until it falls out of the tree.
The dog is a specially trained dog. When the gorilla falls out of the tree, the dog will try to bite off the gorilla's balls. When the gorilla moves its hands to protect its balls, you put the handcuffs on it."
This all seems to make sense to the man, but he has one question. "What is the shotgun for?" he asks the poacher. The poacher responds: "If I fall out of the tree before the gorilla, shoot the dog."
Dad: What did your older brother say before he lost his virginity?
Son: Dad, please don't.
Dad: Exactly.
He was saying jokes, and someone said, "You are on a roll!"
A disabled man stands up.
A blind man says, "You can stand?"
A deaf man says, "You can see?"
A mute person says, "You can hear?"
The disabled man says, "You can talk!"
Doctor: "What the actual f**k"
What did the emo kid say to the cashier? ... "Scan my wrists."
If you have a girlfriend/crush that's shorter than you, go up to her and say, "You're short, lemme add some inches."
What do you say to someone's mom?
"You mom gay."
The best joke: you. O wait, I can't even say that because jokes have meaning.
What did the shark say after he ate the clownfish?
"This taste a little funny."