Say jokes

You can understand depression if you are still in school and get bullied by bullies, punished by teachers, and scolded by parents for being that quiet kid who says nothing.

What did the baby cow say to the mommy cow when he saw a hamburger?

"Mommy, is that Uncle Joe?"

What did one shoe say to the other shoe when they were fighting?

I wanna sock you in the eye so bad!

When the school shooter breaks into your classroom, so you try to say goodbye to your Roblox gf, but then the shooter's phone goes off.

People in plays say that everyone's life is a drama, but mine's a tragedy.

What did the dime say to the penny? At least I have more cents than you.

What did the processor say when it was being overclocked?

"Stop it! It hertz so much!"

Whenever your ex says, "You'll never find someone like me," the answer to that is, "That's the point."

My mum once told me, "How do you spell Mississippi?" and I said, "Misisipi." But she said, "No, it goes mi-ss-i-ss-pp-i," and I laughed when she said "pp." Then she said, "Why are you laughing?" I tried saying, "You said pp," but I was laughing too hard.

Two wind turbines were standing on a hill.

One asks, "What's your favorite type of music?"

The other one says, "I'm a big metal fan."

What did the north tower say to the south tower during the summer? Get ready for fall!

So today I heard a friend say she had a stalker. I can confirm I've never seen a stalker following her.

What did the orphan say to the other orphan?

"Get into the Batmobile, Robin."

I'm not saying you're ugly, but you're the reason God created miscarriages!

Michael Jackson broke his window. What does he say? "I can't see."

I still remember the last thing my grandfather said before kicking the bucket: "Hey, wanna see how far I can kick this bucket?"

People say that biting off your finger would be as easy as biting a carrot if your brain didn't try to stop you. How the f do people know that and how many people's fingers did they bite off before coming to that conclusion?

What did the grim reaper say when his favorite car commercial came on? "Safe life repair, safe life replace!"

A man walks into a bar and says, "I'm feeling depressed. What do you have to cheer me up?"

The bartender replied: "A shotgun."

How do you spell ihop?

Then spell ihop and say "ness".