Say jokes
A man is telling his story to someone. "My friends always said that they would kill me if I wore Gucci or Supreme. On April 1st, I wore both and conversed with them."
"Interesting."
"That's the story of how I got to the morgue," he says to The Gatekeeper of Heaven.
An autistic woman walks into a bar. "A serving of Screaming Banshee, please," she says.
The bartender says, "Ok, you seem to like it, unlike a retired special ed teacher that passed through a few minutes ago."
What did the mechanic say to the other mechanic when he broke the car?
"How will we wrench ourselves out of this?"
What did one hurricane say to the other?
"I got my EYE on you!"
What did the skeleton say to Shrek?
"Jump on me. I can have two layers of skin too."
Memes
What did the skeleton say when the other skeleton lied to him?
"You can't lie to me! I can see right through you!"
You will never see a redneck opposing a war.
He will instead say, "Wait, I get to kill people and it's not illegal? And they're foreigners?"
I went up to an orphan bully and I said, "Here, look, I made a website!"
The orphan likes it, but the kid says, "I forgot one feature, though... the home button."
Diddy and Hawk Tuah walk into a bar. Hawk Tuah says, "Spit on that thang!" Only one walks out. 💀
Rapboat says he has a rap career. Wrap career more like, wrapping burgers at McDonald's.
What are the last two words you say after sex before going to sleep?
"Goodnight, Mom!"
What did 0 say to 8?
"Hey, nice belt!"
What did the racist Catholic priest say?
"Martin Luther? Not my king!"
What did the Twin Towers say to the plane?
What did the toaster say to the piece of bread? "I want you inside me."
What did the O say to the O? "O hi O!" (Ohio)
What did the Emo say to the surgeon? "Cut me, please!"
What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer?
We are both lawyers.
The cannibal says to the other cannibal, "I like it when humans fall from the sky because then they are meateor."
What did the orphan's mum say before she abandoned her child?
OH it's a bitch.