Say jokes
People always tell me to say no to drugs, but if I'm talking to drugs, I probably said yes.
“My Mum told me the best time to ask my Dad for anything was during sex. Not the best advice I’d ever been given.
I burst in through the bedroom door saying, ‘Can I have a new bike?’ He was very upset. His secretary was surprisingly nice about it. I got the bike.”
Q: What did people say when Kim Kardashian was at the beach?
A: Stop littering!
What did one emo kid say to the other?
"I like ya cut, G."
What did John say to little Timmy? Happy Disable day!
Why do you think after death the angel says do not be afraid?
Search up biblically accurate angels.
You can say he is not your type until you realize your type is not typing.
He was saying jokes, and someone said, "You are on a roll!"
Your hairline is so bad, when people see the back of your head they say "nice beard!"
What did the priest say during the christening?
"So anyway, I started blasting!"
You know why Santa's saying is "Ho Ho Ho?"
How else is he supposed to give boys and girls a baby brother or sister for Christmas?
What did Jeffrey Dahmer say to the men he took home that said they were hungry? "I've got Ben and Jerry's in the freezer."
What did the poo say when it fell out of your bum?
"Your anus looks like my mum's bedsheet which is smelly and covered in poo."
I also just wanted to add that a Goonie's anus looks like my nan's mouth.
Say this when you answer a spam call...
"Hi, welcome to Bob's Taco Shack and Funeral Home, where yesterday's grief is today's beef."
You also have to learn to say no. For example: "Would you like a piece of cake?" "No, I'd like two."
What do Emos say to each other?
"I like your cuts, G."
A boy walks up to a girl and says, "I would tell you a joke about my dick, but it’s too long."
Then the girl says, "Yeah, I would tell you a joke about my pussy, but you’ll never get it."
What did the floor say to the ceiling?
"I look up to you."
What should you never say to an orphan?
"Your Mom."
What did the one orphan say to the other orphan?
"Get in the Batmobile, Robin."