Say jokes

What did the tomato say to the empty ketchup bottle? "GOD STAY AWAY FROM ME!"

Do you know why the cake doesn't ever fight anyone?

He says, "Take a peace of that!" while entering a fight.

Why did the ocean wave?

It wanted to say "Hi Tide."

What did the hamster say to the penis? "Ha, you look just like me!"

Hi, I'm Saul Goodman. Did you know that you have rights? The Constitution says you do, and so do I. I believe that until proven guilty, every man, woman, and child in this country is innocent, and that's why I fight for you, Albuquerque!

Alex Stokes says, "Kat, I've seen you eat many foods!"

What did the emo kid say to the other?

"I like ya cut, G."

What did the baseball ⚾️ say to the bat?

“We should touch base.”

What did the parents say to the orphan? "Where are your parents?"

Oh... wait.

Say "I hop in this:".

I made you eat your peas! 🤦

A boy walks up to a girl and says, "I would tell you a joke about my dick, but it’s too long."

Then the girl says, "Yeah, I would tell you a joke about my pussy, but you’ll never get it."

You know why Santa's saying is "Ho Ho Ho?"

How else is he supposed to give boys and girls a baby brother or sister for Christmas?

If I could make someone tell me their last words, they'd say, "Make me."

What does Marcus Rashford say when he comes to the stadium?

I wanna kick some balls!

Me: Okay, Papyrus. I'm no Sherlock Bones, but I'd say that Storyspin Sans is the Imposter.

Al Fayed’s son arrives at heaven’s gates and sees his driver.

He shouts “you stupid cunt!”

The driver says, “Watch, Boss?”

Dodi replies...:

“I said I WANT TO FUCK DI IN THE TUNNEL NOT FUCKING DIE IN THE TUNNEL!”

What did one Geodude say to the other Geodude?

Let’s rock!

I asked the orphan why he was crying. He didn't really say anything.

Then I asked where are your parents? He cried more. I love working at the orphanage.

Q: What did the ocean say to the other ocean?

A: Nothing, they just waved! 🙃

What does the cow say when it's going on holiday? - MOOOOOYORK.