Say jokes
When a fat person steps on a scale, it says: “To be continued.”
What did the orphan say to his stepmom?
"I need help."
A guy walks to his friend's house. His friend says, "Where is your girlfriend?" The guy says, "Meet me at the cemetery in a week."
What did the egg say to the other egg?
Nothing, they can't talk.
What do you say when a person trips?
You say, "Why you trippin'?"
What did the orange say to the other orange?
I orange you glad!
My 3 year old sister kept saying, "I like your cut, G." Every time she does, I dodge and close my eyes, but she's the one who always ends up running.
They say making and having friends comes with some benefits. I guess you could say I have friends with benefits.
If I could make someone tell me their last words, they'd say, "Make me."
How do you say "nose" in Spanish?
hmm.... No sé.
I think the local nudist campground just went out of business.
The sign on their gate says:
"Clothed Until Further Notice."
When your parents say, "We are sorry that you are here," what do you think of that?
I think that you're an accident!
Q: The person who makes it doesn't say what it is.
The person who receives it doesn't know what it is.
The person who knows what it is doesn't want it.
What am I?
A: A baby.
What did the icicle say to the snow?
"Why do you have to be so soft?"
What did the meditating egg say?
A) Ommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmlet!
What did Santa say when he got to the club? Ho, ho, ho!
When I say, "Daddy," my stepbrother raises his head.
What did the Queen Bee say to her bees?
"Beehive yourselves!"
What’s something you can say about vacation, but not about your girlfriend?
Next time I’m bringing all my friends.
A guy asks his priest friend what he wants to eat, and the priest says "bad boys." Then his friend asks, "What kebab do you want?" and the priest says, "B Bricked up Caucasian or Asian will do."