Say jokes
What did the mic say to the rapper?
"Don’t DROP me, bro!"
What did the orphan say to the other?
"Robin, get the Batmobile!"
Say my name if you like "Breaking Bad."
It took me years to figure out the Oreos served in Lunchables are knock offs. On the cover it says “Chocolate Crème Cookies.” I’ve believed this lie for as long as I can remember. Unless they were real back then? I don’t even know at this point. They sure as hell aren’t real now!
What did the other wave say to the other wave?
"Nothing, they just waved!"
Confusion life question!!!
* Can you cry underwater? * Do fishes ever get thirsty? * Why don't birds fall out the tree when they sleep? * Why is a building called that when it's already built? * When they say dog food is new and improved, who tastes it?
What did the farmer who lost his tractor say?
*waits 25 seconds*
"I lost my tractor!"
What's the most motivational thing to say to an orphan? Go big or go home!
Orange: Hey Apple, Apple, hey Apple.
Apple: What?
Orange: Orange you glad I didn't say "Apple" again? Hahaha!
Two men are next to each other. One looks at the other and asks, "Are you a fascist?"
The other man responds, "No, why would I be?"
The first man pulls out a gun and says, "Are you sure?"
The second man says, "Never mind, I am a fascist!"
What did the tree say to the depressed kid?
"Stop hanging around."
A man is about to be hanged. His executioner asks for his last words.
The man says, “Man, it’s hard to think of something when your life is on the line.”
When you're sitting by the mushrooms and you hear one say to the other "Hey, you're a fun guy."
FaceBook Story: My mom loves FaceBook; she literally posts every day, but this day was sort of a hard hit.
So what happened was my mom got tired of her old name on Facebook, so she changed it to Thatmilf85, and I don't want to explain what milf means, but she got a lot of DM's from a lot of old guys. BUT, this one exact guy named Johnny Sins asked my mom if she wanted to do an adult film. I don't know what that is. I think it's an adult movie, of course, so she says yes and flies out to San Diego, and she never came back after yesterday, and to YOU Johnny Sins, my mom better be Ok and that adult film better be an adult movie and not a por...
They say you should love your neighbor. Does that mean I have to love the president?
What does an emo kid say when they wanna hang out?
"Wanna hang?"
"Water exists."
Airport security: "What the fuck did you just say?"
What did Grant say? "I'm gay."
My friends in my friend group say that I am quiet and I don't do anything bad. I proved them wrong by murdering the leader of it.
What does one emo kid say to the other?
"I like your cuts, G."