Say jokes
After a suicide joke say, "Don't leave me hanging, or I'll cut it out."
What do you say when a handicapped man forgets something? "He knew it like the back of his hand."
This black dude goes up to an Indian guy and says, "What up brotha?"
The Indian guy gets offended and says, "We are not the same."
The black guy then pulls out a gun, and the Indian guy says, "Ok brother, ok brother, we are the same, we are the same."
Do the voice in your head.
What does the mom (or terrorists, fuck that) say for the (twin) towers to eat?
Open wide, here comes the plane!
What did the gay necrophiliac say when his relationship ended?
"That rotten asshole split on me again!"
I know this isn't an orphan joke, but I didn't know where to say it, so yeah.
I threw a nut at the allergy table and screamed, "YES, TRIPLE KILL!"
What did the O say to the O? "O hi O!" (Ohio)
What did the O say to the other O?
O hi O (Ohio).
What did a terrorist say when New York didn't want his food?
"Here Comes The Airplane!"
It isn't really rape if you speak different languages. I mean, how is the man supposed to know what she is saying? Those could be tears of joy and screams of pleasure.
It's not rape if they can't say no. Duct tape.
Jeffrey Dahmer and his mother are having dinner.
His mother says, “I don’t like your friends.”
Then Jeff says, “You can eat the potatoes.”
What did the twin tower say to the other?
"I need to catch this plane."
A man marries a blonde chick, lives a happy life together, and the man asks his wife if she wants kids. She says "yes".
So, a couple of years go by, and they have one boy and one girl. They go to school, go home with their report cards, and the dad asks what their grades were. The son says he's not doing well, same with the daughter. They ask why they're doing so bad in school, and the dad replies with "ask your mother that question!"
Paralyzed Man: *gets up* I’m out of here!
Blind Man: Did that paralyzed man just get up?
Deaf Man: Did that Blind Man see that paralyzed man get up?
Mute Man: Did that deaf man just hear the blind man see the paralyzed man get up?
Dead Man: Did that mute man just say did that deaf man just hear the blind man see the paralyzed man get up?
“Normal” Man: Did that dead man hear the mute man say did that deaf man hear the blind man see the paralyzed man get up?
Doctor: *calls 911*
911 service: 911 what’s your emergency?
Doctor: Yes, uh, a “normal” person just said that did that dead man just hear a mute man say did that deaf man just hear the blind man see a paralyzed man get up?
911 service: *hangs up*
What did Michael Scott say to someone when he passed a plate of vegetables?
Boom! Roasted!
Wow, these jokes are lit.
Some might say even killer!
What did the plane say to the towers: "Can't go over it, can't go under it, oh no, we got to go through it."
I got my COVID test today, it says 50. What does that mean? Also, my IQ test came back positive.
What did the lettuce say to the carrot?
"Lettuce be friends!"