What do you say when you hear someone tripping over at night?
Goddammit, Jamal!
Say Jokes
@ the N-word of your dreams, why you not say nun on the fuckin community? You should talk on ther my g.
I'm Asian and there is a saying that dogs are man's best friends. They are my best friends because they keep me from starving.
A guy who just got robbed says, "I've been hacked, and the hacker ransomware!"
What can’t a Black person say to a police officer?
"Thanks for the warning."
I hate it when you say your life is a joke because a joke actually has meaning.
"What did the zero say to the eight?"
"That belt looks good on you!"
What did Kermit the Frog say at Jim Henson's funeral? Nothing.
A doctor walks into a room with a dying patient and tells him, "I'm sorry, but you only have 10 left."
The patient asks him, "Ten what, Doc? Hours? Days? Weeks?"
The doctor calmly looks at him and says, "Nine."
They say that breakfast is the most important meal of the day. Well, not if it's poisoned. Then the antidote becomes the most important.
It took me years to figure out the Oreos served in Lunchables are knock offs. On the cover it says “Chocolate Crème Cookies.” I’ve believed this lie for as long as I can remember. Unless they were real back then? I don’t even know at this point. They sure as hell aren’t real now!
What did the white baby say to his Chinese parents?
"Two wongs don’t make a white."
"A priest, an imam, and a rabbit walk into a clinic to donate blood. The rabbit turns to the nurse and says, 'I think I'm a Type-O!'"
A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can.
Three years later there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says: “What the hell was that all about?”
A pair of cows were talking in the field. One says, “Have you heard about the mad cow disease that’s going around?”
“Yeah,” the other cow says. “Makes me glad I’m a penguin.”
A kid asks his mom what dark humor is.
She says, “You see that man with no arms, tell him to clap.”
“But mom, I’m blind!” says the kid.
“Exactly,” replied the mom.
What do Christians and gays have in common?
They both say, “Oh God” when they get on their knees.
A cop pulls two Arabian men over, walks up to their window, and says, "We are looking for two child molesters!"
Now after a short pause, the two men look at each other, then back at the officer and say, "We'll do it!"
What did the mama moose say to the calf after it got on her nerves?
"I'm not a-moosed right now."
What did mommy spider say to baby spider?
You spend too much time on the web.
