Say jokes
What did the kid say to the orphan?
"Well, at least I have parents!"
What did one nut say to the other nut when it was chasing it?
“I’m gonna cashew!”
A grasshopper jumps into a bar.
The bartender says, "We've got a drink named after you."
The grasshopper says, "Seriously? Why would you name a drink Callum?"
What did one nut say to the other?
“Cashew later.”
What did the goat say?
"Let's play the grass!"
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣funny joke yes
What did the toilet say to the other toilet? "You look a bit flushed."
The toothbrush says, "I have the worst job in the whole world."
The toilet paper behind him says, "Yeah, right."
(True story)
One day Sally's mom said, "I can just eat you up!" And Sally says, "No, you can't!" Then the mom asks why and Sally says, "Because I'm a beaner, and we don't taste good."
People, when your lover cheats on you, do this!
1. Start a conversation. 2. Say, "What's that smell?" 3. They will smell around. 4. Say, "OMG, it's a b****," and walk away and ignore them.
How do you surprise a blind guy?
Say, "Surprise!"
What did Hermione say when she pantsed someone?
"Wow, Harry!"
What did the emo say to the popular kid?
"Go fuck yourself for thinking all emos cut because they don't... y'know, for a matter of fact, fuck all you guys..."
Little Johnny brings his cat to school, and then the teacher asked him why. Little Johnny says, "Because I heard my dad tell my mom I'm going to eat that pussy up when the kids leave!"
What did God say to the good shepherd?
Nothing.
What did the parents say to the orphans?
"YOU CAN'T SEE ME!"
There are two kids sitting in a classroom: Lily and John. Lily sleeps in class every day.
The teacher asks Lily who made heaven and earth. John pokes her with a pencil. She shouts, "Jesus Christ Almighty!"
The teacher says, "That's right."
The teacher says the next day she asks the same question. John pokes her with a pencil. She shouts, "Jesus Christ Almighty!"
"That's right," the teacher says.
The next day she asks Lily what did Eve say to Adam after their 100th. John pokes her again. "If you stick that thing in me one more time, I'mma break it in half!" she shouts.
A girl walks up to her blind friend who she had not seen in a while and says: "Long time no see!"
A train walks into a bar. It says to the barkeeper, "I'll have a gallon of ale."
"A gallon?" the barkeeper asks.
"Yes," replies the train, "I always end up chugging it."
Bro, stop. You guys are saying the same jokes over and over. If you're gonna tell a 9/11 joke, just go laugh about the Great Thumps.
Sonic says... April 1st is the best day to do a school shooting. They will think it’s a joke! 😃