Q:Why did the baby cross the road?
A:it wasn't in its car seat
Why do I carry pepper spray? JUST IN CASE OF AS-SAULT.
when a stranger keeps telling kids to kill themself AKA the stigg
So a women was paranoid so she had a dog to check to see if anything was wrong. She would always stick her hand under the bed and if the dog licked her hand then she was safe.One night just before bed she stuck her hand under the bed. She felt a lick so she went to bed. She in the middle of the night needed to go to the bathroom. So she walked into the bathroom and on the window it said: HUMANS CAN LICK TOO! Then she was murdered.
People say dogs are like their owners. So true. My dog keeps on running into the street as if she doesn't care about her life. I don't care about her life either hahahaha!!;)
Where is the most dangerous place for a human being to be? In the womb of a woman who wants to abort her unborn baby. π’
Always practice safe sex: paint an x on the sheep that kick.
I rode to the bottle shop on my bike yesterday. I bought a whole bottle of wine and put it in the basket on the front of my bike. Then I thought, if I fell off my bike on the way back home, it would out and shatter. So I drank all the wine and threw away the bottle. It was a good idea, because I fell off my bike about four times on the way back.
Today we need to teach our teens about having safe sex while using contraceptives. condoms 99 percent effective birth controll 99 percent effective ect just be like me and use underage 7 year olds works 100 percent of the time ( only cost 20 years in jail ;)
i gave the blind kid a gun and said it was a hair dryer
Do you put a baby in the microwave covered or uncovered?
Covered, it can take weeks to clean up the explosion.
what dose a orphan call a family photo a sefey
You donβt need a parachute to go skydiving, you need a parachute to go skydiving twice.
Why do people not adhere to the corona measures? Because they hate their lives and want to die.
How does a rapper keep their money safe?
In a RAP VAULT
Why did the skydiver bring a backup parachute?
In case the first one wanted to "cut ties" with them mid-air.
If you think Tracy Latimer's murder was in any way justified, Put on your helmet cause you're about to miss the short bus.
Billy moved in with 69 pedophiles when he was 8. Many "tears" came across his cheeks.
How do you fit a baby in a glass?
A blender
How do you get it out?
Explosives!
Whats yellow and blue and found at the bottom of a pool? A baby with slashed floaties
