Reproduction jokes
What happens when premenstrual Raggedy Ann gets with the Pillsbury Dough Boy?
A red headed bitch with a yeast infection.
What is the difference between an egg and you? An egg gets laid, and you don't.
What's the name of a cannibal's favorite all-you-can-eat buffet? Planned Parenthood!
What do sperm say while just in?
"We need to go deeper."
As a little boy, I walked in on my parents having intercourse one night, and of course, my parents stopped and sent me back to bed.
The next day my dad tells me, "Don't worry son, I wasn't hurting mommy, we were just trying to make you a little sister."
So, when I was young I always wanted a pet. I then looked at my father and asked, "Could you do mommy doggy style next time? I want a puppy."
If Donald Trump had sex with an orange, guess what his son would be?
An orange tree! :>
GF: Laying down.
BF: GROANING
GF: Are you good at aiming and shooting?
BF: Yeah, why?
GF: Shoot that did in there.
BF: Mmmhuugh
I was about to make a baby joke but then decided to abort.
Hi, welcome to David’s sperm bank. You jack it, we pack it. How may I help you?
What's red, six inches long, and made my girlfriend cry when I fed it to her?
Her miscarriage.
The best part of you ran down your mother's leg... Einstein got ready to climax while doing math but realized you can't cumtilyain cumtilion. It's after sucktillion fucktillion.
I was gonna tell a baby joke, but I had to abort.
How do you know if you have a high sperm count?
She chews before she swallows.
If a man kills a kid, it's called Murder.
If a woman kills a kid, it's called Reproductive Rights.
What do five dicks sticking out of glory holes and five udders both have in common? They are ready for milking.
What's similar between a fetus and a failed mission?
You abort it.
Burger King got Dairy Queen pregnant during sex, cause he forgot to wrap his Whopper.
What is white and comes out after you have sex?
Cum!
I was camping with my buddy, and there was a fire. We were roasting marshmallows, and there was a vine. I tripped on it and went penis first into the fire, and I said, "Well, there goes your children, stupid ass!"
Papa John's pizzeria and abortion clinic. You make 'em, we bake 'em.