I apologise for this joke lmfaooo, and you have probably heard this banger before, anyways;
What is the difference between a priest and a zit? 👀 The zit waits till you are 13 to come on your face 🤧
Religion Jokes
How does a priest purify water?
Boil the hell out of it!
What does Jesus have in common with Pinocchio?
They believe their own lies.
What do volcanoes and suicide bombers have in common?
They both erupt when triggered.
Three nuns are having a charity in front of the church.
A man in a trench coat walks up and flashes the three nuns. The first nun had a stroke, the second nun had a stroke, but the third nun, her arm was too short.
Did you hear about the flood at the circus? Lots of people drowned, and there were two clowns that survived and two nuns still in the audience.
The two clowns ran over to the two nuns, and each one put a nun on his shoulder. Then they waded out of the big top, up to their waists in the rapid, turbulent water. As they were reaching dry land, one clown said to the other, "If you ask me, this is virgin on the ridiculous!"
So the man asks me, "Jesus, how do you want your steak?"
So I said, "Well done, my good faithful servant, well done."
A depressed man has been thinking of killing himself, and his friend says, "Find God, he'll help you!"
Then the man said, "There’s only one way to get to God, and that is through Jesus. Have you, my friend, found him?"
Satan and the devil are alter egos.
They say we will have eternal life when Jesus is no longer coming.
Why are short people so angry?? Cause they're closer to hell.
What’s the difference between a Black man and a Jew?
One was born burnt.
Not all roses are red; Not all violets are blue; If you're reading this, God loves you.
One of the reasons the skeleton was not allowed to play church music is because he had no organs.
A rapist, pedophile, and a priest walk into a bar. He orders a beer.
Same person.
When Mother Teresa went to heaven, she was greeted by Saint Peter with a halo for her dedication to the needy. After walking around for a while, she saw Lady Diana with a bigger halo. She got angry at Lady Diana and went to Saint Peter and asked him why she had a bigger one, and Saint Peter said, "Oh, that’s not a halo, that’s a steering wheel."
How do you kill a little boy?
You throw him between two Catholic priests.
Do you know why Jesus is so popular with the ladies??
Haven't you ever seen pictures of the guy? He was hung like this... 🤚--------🤪----------✋
Q: What's the difference between Jesus and a picture?
A: One uses one nail to hang.
What’s the difference between Jesus and Maddie McCann?
One had the last supper.
