Religion jokes
How does Jesus make tea?
Hebrews it.
A gay couple actually goes to heaven. Turns out Jesus was a hypocrite.
Why did Steven Hawkins go to hell?
Because he couldn't walk the stairs to heaven.
What is a priest's favorite song?
-- Magic Flute in A minor.
Christianity.
My friend: What are you doing?
Me: I'm making holy water.
My friend: How?
Me: I'm boiling the hell out of it.
What do you call a pansexual pedophile? Jesus.
What did the choir boy sing to the priest? Nothing, his mouth was full.
Meya eats meat all her sins is go off when she eat meat.
What happened to the eight-year-old boy that needed to go to the bathroom during church?
The priest stopped him on the way there.
Stephen Hawking couldn't make it to Heaven because there were stairs, so he rolled down to Hell.
I only believe in 12.5% of the bible. I'm an EIGTHeyist.
The holy water in this church is of the highest quality: it has been assed by the bishop.
Baptism, a chance for the priest to bathe you.
When God created women, it was an accident. He meant to make a man, but then "WHOA-MAN!!"
God better hope they got an elevator to Heaven.
How do you make holy water?
You take it to church ⛪️
Why does Santa not have any children?
He only cums once a year.
What do McDonald's and priests have in common?
They both stick their meat in 10 year old buns.
Guy: Why can't Jesus have M&M's?
Priest: Why?
Guy: Because they'll fall through the hole in his hands.