Relationship jokes

After every line, say “I’m a man.”

I went to the club. (I’m a man)

I met a girl. (I’m a man)

I took her to the bar. (I’m a man)

We got some drinks. (I’m a man)

I took her home. (I’m a man)

We got in bed. (I’m a man)

She whispered in my ear... (I’m a man)

When you realize your friend standing next to you is adopted and narrates everything he does.

I was outside digging a six-foot hole when I found a treasure box with jewels and shiny gems! I almost went inside to tell my wife, then I remembered why I was digging the hole.

My newly wed wife is a porn star. She would probably kill me if she found out.

Your mum said, "Who did it?" Ya nan!

Life is like a game of poker, guys start by going with them clubs, ladies follow with a set of hearts, guys put down the diamonds, and before you know it you got a full house.

"The dad was so horny he wanted to have sex with his wife, but his wife said no, so he fucked his daughter."

Every woman will die in five seconds.

Mother: Dies.

Sister: Dies.

Girlfriend: Lives.

You: 🤬

Evan, this is Mya, and your mom told me you were adopted, so we are done. Bye, don’t talk to me.

I bet you like men!

My family.

How on God's green earth does my boyfriend have a phone?

JK WE NEED TO TALK ILL TYPE THE SECRET CODE (YOU'LL KNOW WHAT IT MEANS.) GREEN PUSSY CAT LIKES BANNANS.

I told my mom I'm happy and she said: "I didn't know you were gay."

You tell your dad what one plus one is and he says five. You forgot that your dad's brain is on the floor.

Your so broke your mom can't afford your daddy.

My bro said food was cool. So I threw a piece of cool chicken at him. For some reason, he hit me, OOF.

Wow, Aiden, maybe you've been mean to Tenya. She is hurting, close to killing herself, but hey, I can pick your ass since, ya know, that is what I do!

Why do orphans have sex toys? Because the uncle isn't there.

Colder than the conversation between a fat guy and a Super Model...

Roses are red, violets are blue, it's really no wonder your mama left you!