Relationship jokes
I have a daughter; she’s a fan. Her name is Penny. Fan she was born on the mountain Pen y Fan. I adopted her because her mum fell off the cliff after birthing Penny. It doesn’t matter, really; Penny’s mum wasn’t a big fan of her anyway.
Gay person to girl: What’s your favorite planet?
Girl: Penus-(penis)(venus), and what is yours?
Gay person: What else, it's Your Anus (Uranus)!😅
So, I was f**king my daughter the other night, and I don’t know what was funnier: the looks on my wife’s face when she walked in on me or the fact that the abortion clinic let me keep her.
What am I doing?
Your mom.
"Today was the worst day ever." "Why?" Because my ex got hit by a bus, and I lost my job as a bus driver.
I'm really bored. Can someone talk with me? None of my friends are responding to me :(
Why did Anna give Carson a blowjob?
He made her.
Why are blind people gay?
Cause.
I broke up with my girlfriend and stole her wheelchair.
Guess who likes vegetables now?
My mum.
I would make a joke about your sister, but she banged me.
My dad left for milk 4 hours ago, anyone know where he is?
Roses are red, violets are blue, I'll f*ck your mom, and you'll be next.
Why can't orphans be gay?
'Cause they have no one to call "daddy."
What did Little Johnny say to his dad?
Johnny: "Dad, please not again! I'm too young!"
Scissoring is nice when I grind my wee wee on my wife’s clit.
Humping that little guy is like riding a wet butt plug.
You ever had sex with a woman that is so fat, it counted as a threesome?
What did Sophie Brussaux's baby get every week?
A face full of sperm.
She'd suck my dick and let me suck her tits.
I'm Joe Biden's husband.