Relationship jokes
What do a pulse and an orgasm have in common?
I don’t care if she has one.
Nana when Zane kisses her in her mind: [Insert Chiwawa Scream!]
"Nice pants. Can I test the zipper?"
Why do orphans miss Mother’s Day? Because they don’t have a mother to give to!
Why is the orphan cold?
'Cause there's no one to cuddle with.
Are you feeling down? Because I wanna feel you up.
What is the difference between your dad and a boomerang? The boomerang comes back.
What did the brother say to the other brother? "You are brother, brother."
My dad left me, lol.
Hi my sweet friends! This is for everyone who needs help right now :)
Why is the divorce rate among socks so high?
All I wanna do is *gunshots* *gunshots* *gunshots* and *click* *cash register noise*, unlearn years of trauma and maintain healthy habits and fulfilling relationships while learning how to have solid boundaries and a whole sense of self.
A baby and his father are sitting in a street cafe. A woman bends over to pick up her keys just as a gust of wind blows up the woman's dress. "va va voom," the baby says. The dad chuckles and says, "Yes. I'd like to have sex with her too."
Why did the orphan turn gay?
A: Because he wanted someone to call him "daddy."
How to tell your kid is adopted? Hi Daisy, let's play a game called "You're adopted!" I will start: Your mum died so I had to adopt you, but don't think I love you because you were the only kid there, haha!
Are there support groups for men?
An orphan goes to a family restaurant with her doll.
"I'm sorry but you can't be here," said the man. "This is a family restaurant." The orphan said, "This is my family," then pointed to her doll.
What did one volcano say to the other? I lava you.
Kurt Cobain said he wished he was gay.
That's why he married Courtney Love.
Hey girl, are you a diamond pick?
'Cause I'm as hard as obsidian.