Relationship jokes
"Karma is the guy on the Chiefs, Coming straight home to me."
Jack & Jill went up the hill so Jack could lick her candy...but Jack got a shock and a mouth full of c0ck cuz Jill's real name was Randy.
When someone pops up in your life making you all happy, you be like, "Who sent you?"
I dated an Indian girl for about six months. She was always Sikhing attention.
Have you watched the show "Naked and Afraid"? Well, I play it every Saturday with my uncle.
Wife: “I want another baby.”
Husband: “That’s a relief, I also really don’t like this one!”
Your mom was dating a boy that had a twin brother, but she did it with the wrong one.
What's the difference between milk and my dad?
Nothing, I apparently am allergic to both because I never see either of them.
I told my dad to get me a packet of cigarettes, he never came back.
AND I still didn't get my FUCKING CIGARETTES!
What do you think of your mom? I have to go now and tyyyytt.
Having sex with three people is a threesome.
Having sex with four people is a foursome.
Then maybe I am handsome after all...
Q: Why is marriage not a word?
It's a life sentence!
A gay couple and a lesbian couple are going on a cruise. Who gets there first?
Obviously, the lesbian couple; they got their lickety-split. The gay couple was still packing their shit.
I was just informed that my ex was stabbed yesterday. Let's just say I quit my job as a butcher.
Your mama is so stupid. We were playing catch, and I told her to go deep. She grabbed a shovel and dug a hole.
So if you say a bear shoots children, and Leah likes Mason Boswells, and I go to Benjamin Adlard year 6.
When an orphan takes a family photo, it’s called a selfie.
Hi, people. I really need a friend. Can someone please be my friend? Say in comments if you will.
"Yo mama so bad we gotta switch to yo papa."
Don't break girls' hearts. Break their legs instead. They're two.