Are you suicide? Cause I'm tryna commit to you.
Q: How did Burger King get Dairy Queen pregnant?
A: He forgot to wrap his Whopper.
What does a Chinese guy say to the love of his life ?! "Your the ying to my yang" !
How do you know when you girlfriend is to young ?
you have to make airoplane noises to get her to open her mouth..
sorry
Like this if you are a single Pringle like me
Today I ate out my girlfriend.......Jefrrey Dahmer style
Whats the same with a controller and a woman?
They both work if you hit them.
Guy: Hi, how was your day today. Woman: Good! Guy: *Well I can’t ask her out cause she’s pregnant* Guy: How many months pregnant are you? Woman: What to you mean?!?! Also I’m not pregnant.
I like my women like I like my microwaves.
Hot, ready to go when I am, and able to kill any baby I put in her.
I have a girlfriend.
Are you a bowling ball? Because I want to stick 3 fingers in you.
Roses are red, violets are fine, I'll be the six, you be the nine.
I just did a test to see who my soulmate is and it said “best friend “ so I guess I am gay. I think so WTF
My crush: OMG my dog just died!😭😭😭😭😭
Me: Oh my goodness I am so sorry I am here for you!
My crush: I have a boyfriend...🙄
Me: Yeah well I have a dog
Brian has a crush on a cute girl, Sally, from school, so he goes and tells his dad about her, and he says, "Sorry, son, you can't like her; she is your sister." So Brian is okay with it, and he starts to like another girl, Madison, and he goes up to his dad and says, "I have a crush on this girl, Madison," and again the dad goes, "Oh, sorry, son, you can't like any girl in school; they are all your sisters." So he goes crying to his mom and says, "Dad said I can't like any girl because they are all my sisters," and the mom goes, "Oh, it's okay; you can like any girl you want because he is not your dad."
i have 25 friend from the alphabet.But don't ask me y.
Father : "That's great son. Who is she?"
Son: "It's Tina, the neighbor's daughter".
Father : "Ohhh I wish you hadn't said that.I have to tell u something son, but you must promise not to tell your mother.Tina is actually your sister."
The boy is naturally bummed out, but a couple of months later
Son : "Daddy, I fell in love again and she is even hotter!"
Father : "That's great son. Who is she?"
Son: "It's Peny, the other neighbor's daughter."
Father : "Ohhhh I wish you hadn't said that. Peny is also your sister."
This went on couple of times and the son was so mad,he went straight to his mother crying.
Son : "Mum I am so mad at dad ! I fell in love with six girls but I can't date any of them because daddy is their father!"
The mother hugs him affectionately and says:
"My love, you can date whoever you want. Don't listen to him. He is not your Father."!!!
Which planet would I consider dating?
I don’t know, but not Saturn cause she’s already got a ring on her
why do lincoln like Ronnie anne she is the only one that calls me lamo.
Boy: "My girlfriend didn't dump me, I dumped her..."
Off the nearby cliff.
