Relationship jokes
I have a friend who doesn't have a dad.
He says: "You're useless, go to hell!"
Me: "Wait, why do you want me to join your dad?"
What do you call it when an orphan takes a photo?
A family photo.
Knock knock. Who's there? Not your dad.
I walk in on my mum and she's in the middle of pulling off my dad's boxers. I said, "Mum, you really spoil those dogs!"
I walk in from work to find my wife dead on the sofa.
As I unzip for one last ride, she says, "BOO!" What kind of sick fuck does that?
I come in from work to see my wife dead on the sofa. As I unzip for one last ride, she says, "BOO!" What kind of a dick fuck does that!
You: I want my mama.
Me: Soz, you can't even get one.
What do people have that orphans don't? A family.
What actor do orphans hate?
Dom Terreto (family).
My friend asked me why I know how to tie a noose.
I told them, "because I’m such a noose-ance."
I think people should date orphans, because their parents are never home.
Alright, so I have a few orphan jokes. I'm gonna put them all in one message.
Why can't orphans be gay? They have no one to call "daddy."
Why can't orphans go on a field trip? Parent signature: ______
New teacher: I used to be an orphan as a kid. Students: hahaha Teacher: Is anyone missing? Students: No one, just your parents.
Why did the orphan become a prostitute? They kept calling everyone "daddy."
Why do orphans have the iPhoneX? Because it has no home button.
Why can’t orphans be gay?
Because they don’t have anybody to call “daddy.”
Peanuts are hard to crack, just like my ex-wife's heart.
What do girls and rocks have in common?
The flat ones get skipped.
Cousins on the streets means lovers in the sheets. 😂👀
Why do orphans have sex toys? Because the uncle isn't there.
My girlfriend called me a pedophile. That's a big word for a six-year-old.
What do you call it when an orphan takes a picture?
A family portrait/A selfie.
What do you call it when an orphan takes a picture?
A family portrait.