Red jokes
Roses are red, I failed my test, All because of Hugh and his incest.
What do you call a baby with red on it?
A baby in a microwave.
What is white, black, and red and can't fit through a revolving door?
A nun with a spear through her head!
The teacher asked a young boy in primary school, "Can you tell me the alphabet?"
To which the boy replies, "No."
The teacher then sets his homework to learn the alphabet.
At home, the boy goes up to his mum, who is on the phone, and asks, "Can you tell me the alphabet?"
"Shut up," she replied.
The boy goes to his dad, who just won the footie match, and asks, "Can you teach me the alphabet?"
But the dad is too busy celebrating and shouting, "Hell yeah! Hell yeah! Yeaaahh!"
The boy goes to his big brother and asks him to teach him the alphabet.
But his brother is singing, "I'm Michael Jackson, I'm Michael Jackson!"
The boy goes to his sister and asks her for the alphabet.
But his sister is singing, "In my big red car, in my big red car!"
The next day the teacher asks him the alphabet.
The boy replies, "Shut up."
"Alright, I'm sending you to the principal's office right now."
The boy replies, "Hell yeah! Hell yeah! Yeaaahh!"
In the office, the principal says, "Who do you think you are?"
The boy replies, "I'm Michael Jackson, I'm Michael Jackson!"
The principal now says, "How do you think you'll get away with this?"
The boy then replies, "In my big red car, in my big red car!"
Roses are red, my mental health is blue, Karen got no mom like you.
If Stephen Hawking was an Xbox... he just red ringed and rose up to GameStop.
What is red, green, lies in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs?
...A girl scout that got hit by a car.
Roses are red, violets are blue, all these orphan jokes have ruined this site. Fuck you!
Are you a razor? 'Cause you make me red.
To All The Naruto Fans:
Sharingan is red, Rasengans are blue, If you dare touch my daughter, I'll Chidori you!
What do you call it when Red Sox can't pull out?
Boston cream pie.
Bambi was calmly eating grass. All of a sudden, a red dot pointed near his heart caught his attention. He looked around anxiously, and he saw a man in camouflage. He whispered, "Time to join mother, Bambi!" Bambi knew what this meant. He ran. He heard a gunshot, followed by a wave of extreme pain. Bambi fell to the ground. He glanced at his leg, which was no longer attached to his body. The man in camouflage came up to him and stabbed him in the heart. Everything went black...
Roses are red, grass is greener. When I think of you, I play with my wiener.
I am a God. Na, na, na, na, na, na. Yeah.
She's got makeup by the mirror in her bedroom, Thigh-high fishnets and some black boots, Nose pierced with the cigarette perfume, Half dead, but she still looks so cute. She is a monster in disguise, And she knows all the words to the trap songs, Takes pic's with a cherry-red lipstick, Says she only dates guys with a big..., mmm
Doctor Seuss break up lines:
"One fish, two fish, blue fish, red fish, I'm breaking up with you, bitch."
Roses are red, I wish you were dead.
Boy: Mom, why are you drinking this disgusting red soup? I wanted salad.
Mom: Quiet, son. We only get this once a month.
Roses are red, violets are bl-- oh yeah, I'm bad at jokes.
Roses are red, violets are blue.
If you are a female pedo, I am looking for you.
And if you want, I'll give you my wand.
Yo mamma so dumb that she jumped off a building after drinking Red Bull.