Recreation jokes
An 80-year-old blind man asks his grandson, "Can you grab my glasses?"
Then the grandson says, "Did you get in the flour again?"
Grandpa said, "No, it was the weed."
Two kids are out in the cold, with downpours of snow erupting from the clouds.
One of the kids says something: "Can we build a snowman that is going through puberty?"
The other kid says something else: "Yes. It sounds cool."
After a while, the snowman was finished, and some words jut out of the first kid's mouth: "Wow! Look at that snowman! It's got hair all over, but I think it's missing something though."
The other kid jumps a little and begins speaking: "Oh, I know what it is!"
After a while, a body part made of a carrot and two cucumbers appears on the snowman's crotch. It is a penis and a ballsack.
The first kid speaks: "Icy what you did there."
The other kid replies: "Good thing I didn't slip up there."
The first kid replies: "Well, that's snow problem."
The other kid then uttered this: "These puns would make the most frigid individual crack up."
The first kid then says: "I know, right?"
They then begin a snowball fight.
The other kid then says: "Only the men have snowballs!"
Tonight I'm making a fort. I'm calling it Fortnite.
What do you call a kid in a hot tub?
Vegetable soup.
Why did Dad say no to the pool? Because he can't swim.
Why does an orphan love baseball? Because their ball comes back, get pranked, bitch!
I was playing basketball and a guy in a wheelchair asked if he could play.
I looked at him and told him that we are looking for ankle breakers, yours are already broken.
I like to drown in a pool.
I mean billiards...
A ball hit me in the vagina.
Why did the rapper go to the beach? (Part 2)
To drop some TIGHT RHYMES!
"Why don't skeletons go skydiving?"
"Because they don't have the guts... or the parachute!"
Why did the rapper smoke dope?
To learn how to drop some DOPE beats!
One day I went skating and skated for so long that my feet were incredibly sore.
It was like my skates were moving all by themselves, but I decided to just roll with the situation.
What did the ball say to the other ball? "You're baller!"
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other slide.
Yo mama so fat when she wanted to get wet, she used the highway as a slippin' slide!
What is the difference between a baby and a trampoline?
You take your shoes off to jump on one.
Why did the child cross the playground? To get to the other slide.
Jack and his kids went to the lake, and his mother wants him to go swimming. You know what he says? "Back where you came from!"
Did you hear about the gay guy who got kicked off the golf course?
He was playing with too many strokes.