Puns
Puns, that's how I roll.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
He doesn't know where home is.
How many line cooks does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Three. One to do it, and two to say that they did it better at the previous restaurant they were at.
The police told everyone to put their hands up, and the police were having fun waving their hands around.
If you are dehydrated, you should get well soon.
This rat did the most amazing thing ever; it was pretty radical, dude.
Why do cemeteries have fences around them? People are dying to get in.
Atoms are untrustworthy little critters. They make everything up!
Last night I had a dream about fishing poles, turns out it wasn't reel!
What type of jam can you not eat?
Traffic jam.
A man puts in ten jokes into a joke contest. He hopes that at least one will win. Sadly, no pun intended.
What do you do with a broken bird? You re-parrot!
Wanna hear a joke?
Your outfit. Har har!
What do you get when you cross a belt and a watch?
A waist of time.
What’s your favorite type of wood? Mine is Bollywood.
I was going to make a 9/11 joke, but I'm afraid it will crash and burn.
What did the 0 say to the 8?
"Nice belt."
I know a lot of jokes, but I could learn a femor.
I drove past Wendy’s the other day. No other stores were open, so I asked, “Wendy’s openin’ then?”
Paper.
Aww c'mon! I thought my joke made the cut!