Puns

What kind of vegetable makes the best receptionist?

Cauliflower.

Tonight I'll be eating freshly grown pork cutlets with a fresh juicy amount of Poké Balls.

Do you get what I am trying to poke out?

The person to make the first cannabinol cookbook had a wife and ate (eight) children.

I ate the last of my Egyptian food, and now I falafel. I don't know why I made that joke. Probably just becuscus.

Q: What did Tim say when his girlfriend fell down a rabbit hole?

A: Hole-y shit!

My friend Arid asked me what I did over the weekend. I told him, "I read."

Get it? I read? No... ok.

Why didn’t the girl like stairs?

They were always up to something.

A goat drank my Red Bull, so now it's a Baphomet!

I tried to find a camouflage shirt, but I couldn’t find one.

How many thumbs down can this joke get?

Joke: Runescape, mustard, tits, Pamela Anderson.

Pineapple goes on pizza.

Flat Earthers

An apple a day can do so much more than keep the doctor away... it can keep ANYONE away.

if you throw it hard enough.

I didn't trip and fall... I attacked the floor, and I believe I am winning :3

Dear math,

Please grow up and solve your own problems. I'm tired of solving them for you.

Thanks.

Runescape is the only form of birth control that is 100% effective.

The flower made a phone call and became cauliflower.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs laying in a pile of leaves?

Russell

Wanna know how I got away from Iraq? Iran.

You are all going to be pun-ished!