Puns
You cat to be kitten me right meow!
I know that my jokes are never punny but...
Why don't phones wear glasses? Because they have contacts!
Hitler was a dic-tator.
What do you call a goldfish that got third place? A bronze fish.
JOKES
1. my life 2. pat as a cat.
I would tell you a cat pun, but it's too purr-fect to share.
Why is a sweet potato casserole so sweet? Because it's so sweet to eat!
Q: A guy walks into a bar, what does he say?
A: Ow!
No, no, no, no. Spot the intruder.
There's no one.
Sans: “pokes brother with ruler”
Papyrus: Sans, what are you doing?
Sans: Measuring your patience.
Papyrus: Grunts
I woke up on the floor this morning. I think I woke up on the wrong side though.
I told my doctor I ate a bunch of bananas. It wasn’t a very a-peeling experience.
Have you tried eating a clock?
It's time-consuming!
How does a turkey drive a car? He wings it.
What do you call a fish that can use a katana?
A salmon-rai.
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field.
Is it just me, or are magnets really attractive?
I was going to make a 9/11 joke, but I'm afraid it will crash and burn.
This is supposed to be worst puns but most of them are not puns.