Puns
People shouldn’t be afraid during a zombie apocalypse.
They can stay in their living room.
What did Onett and Threed reply to their child?
"I love you Twoson."
What did Yarn Yoshi say to Poochy whilst trying to solve a puzzle?
"Alright Poochy, it's time to get crafty!"
What’s Brock from Pokemon's favorite food?
Brockoli.
I told my mum the refrigerator was running, so she got dressed and ran after it...
What did the vegetable say to the other before the fight?
Time to beet your maker.
What do you call a retreat in war?
A backup plan.
You heard a conversation between Sans and Papyrus:
Sans: "Sub bro."
Papyrus: "DON'T 'SUB' ME BROTHER! YOU STILL DIDN'T REDINTEGRATE YOUR PUZZLES!"
Sans: "Easy bro, I have done a ton of work today."
Sans: "A skele-ton."
(Drum effect)
Papyrus: "OH MY GOD SANS!"
So I went to the binoculars shop the other day. Tell you what, they saw me coming.
How do you knockout an unorthodox blue tooth?
You get a good connection.
Two Trojan warriors were patrolling the streets of Troy at night. It was finally time for their duties to be relieved. When they went back to their houses, one Trojan fell in a puddle. "Nitrogen!" The other called. And the other responded coldly, “Good night.”
I walked into the party and the host asked me if I would like a slice of pie.
I responded "yes," and he said: "okay, 14159."
What was the computer's best pickup line?
Nice bits!
What did the two paintings say after a long battle?
Let's call this one a draw.
What did the paintings name their daughter?
Palette.
Why did the cumulonimbus not show up for work?
Because it was on strike.
Q: Why did the two gate-builders start fighting?
A: Because they were fencing.
Q: Why did the fault line start acting crazy?
A: Because it was on crack.
Wanna hear a pizza joke?
Never mind, it's too cheesy.
Do the French people smoke weed or oui'd?