Punchline jokes

I’d tell a joke about my abusive dad, but I only remember the punch line.

So, you wanna hear a joke about the wall?

... Actually, nah, you won't get over it.

Me: Wanna hear a joke about my chin?

Friend: Nah, dude. It'll be too long.

How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb in the middle of the night?

I don't know, I can never see them.

I would make a disabled joke.

But they never work.

Q: What did the drunk emo say to the bartender?

A: Nothing! He was hung over.

Guys we should stop making orphan jokes. Their parents will get mad... oh wait... Continue 🙂

Why did the one-handed man cross the road?

To get to the second-hand store!

Any joke can be funny with the right delivery. Except abortion jokes, because there is no delivery.

Why aren’t orphan jokes funny?

The punchline isn’t apparent.

Why are emo jokes so infamous?

They cut deep.

Three blonde sisters die and are told by an angel that in order for them to go to heaven they have to pass all 100 steps. But each step has a joke, each joke gets funnier and funnier. And in order to pass them all, you can't laugh at any joke or else you go to hell. The blonde girls accept the offer.

So the angel begins telling them the jokes. One of the girls laughs at the 3rd step. The second blonde laughs halfway there. Finally, the last blonde was at the 100th step. The angel said, "This is the last step. If you laugh you will go straight to hell with your sisters and if you don't you can pass." The blonde agrees and the angel starts to tell the joke, "What do you ca..." Out of nowhere the blonde starts bursting out laughing. "Why are you laughing? I haven't even finished the joke yet!" The blonde replies, "I just got the first joke!"

What do you say to a woman with two black eyes?

Nothing, you've told her twice.

When does a joke become a dad joke?

When it leaves and never comes back.

I wish I could say that my life is a joke, but I can't because jokes have a meaning.

What starts with M and ends with arriage?

Miscarriage. Now we all know that joke never gets old, and you know what?

Neither does the child.

You wanna hear a suicide joke? Nvm, it didn't make it.