Psychology jokes

What is the similarity between depressed people and hoodies?

The color black.

I have a fear of speed bumps, but I'm slowly getting over them.

I don’t trust anyone who doesn’t feel like screaming.

For me, the best part of depression is remaining charming around strangers but saving the misery for the ones who love you.

What do you call a group of depressed people?

Suicide squad.

What is the difference between an emo and a normal person?

An emo slits.

Real Pokémon.

Anxiety evolved into depression. Depression was the final stage evolution.

I asked my friend, "Shouldn't we have 6 senses?"

He replied, "What is the 6th sense?"

"Common sense," I shot back while looking at the kid who was going to detention. "Never mind," I said.

What's the difference between a bird and an emo?

Birds fly.

If ignorance is bliss, you must be the happiest person on the planet.

69% of people find something dirty in every sentence.

Your mum's hairline was so long that you decided to get therapy.

This is how to die soft 101.

Yo bro, you good? You need a hug?

Are you an abstract manifestation of my childhood traumas and recent memories combined? 'Cause damn, you look like you came out of a dream!

What will make a depressed teenager happy?

A cliff.

Opinions are like orgasms. The only one that matters is mine and I don't care if you have one.

How many emissions does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, they just sit in the dark and cry.

When you tell the men in the suits you can see that the demons of your sins are watching you...

But they know you're blind.

What happened when the emo kid gave the tree a high five? It left him hanging.

I asked a child where their parents were. They started to cry. I laughed and walked out of an orphanage.