Prison Jokes

in Puns

Did you hear about the four foot tall psychic who escaped prison? He’s a small medium at large.

in Man

I have cancer the doctor said I have 3 days to live but I was like fuck it and killed him the jury said I have life in prison I shouted yes he said thank you you saved my life


I saw a midget prisoner climbing down a ladder the other day and i thought, huh, that’s a little con-descending

in Gorilla

What do you get if you cross a gorilla and a prisoner? A kong-vict.

in Dark Humor

Why is a white prison inmate scarier than a black inmate?

The white guy did it

in Jail

In prison they called me sweet cheeks

Corrienne Strong
in Meat

A man who desperately wanted to be good after serving time in prison was visited by an Angel "You want to change? You can still enter heaven on two conditions …you must bet on the horses with any money you have and pass your winnings to someone less fortunate and you must never hold on to any beef . " The Angel then disappeared.  The man did as was told and became generous and kind …as he emerged from the betting office with all his money… he would pass every penny of it all to a deserving person…each and everytime. He ,however couldn’t seem to avoid meat and would still eat it no matter what .  When he died the Angel came back for him … “But I’m undeserving I can’t come with you” he said … “Yes you can” replied the Angel , “you gave all your stake ( steak) away”

in Emo

Whats the difference between a emo and a prisoner

The prisoner is wanted

Misstiano Penaldo

I am crying tears of joy rn. I was wrongfully sentenced to death. They took me to prison to wait for my execution but, when I got there they said that I was free. I asked them why and they told me that a man named Penaldo had taken my death penalty for me. Thank you Penaldo!


What do you call a convict in prison for touching little girls? A boy named brandon


A prisoner dug out of prison, he appeared in a playground, he said, “I’m free, I’m free.” A kid said, “so what I’m four.”


I think it was wrong for that school shooter to end his life at the scene. He could have done some good by becoming some lonely lifer’s bottom.

in Orphan

why did the judge dismiss court when the orphan walked in even a gay prison would’nt want him

in Emo

Whats the difference between a emo and a prisoner

The prisoner

I mason-Greenwooded ur mom

What Football Club das Mason green wood play for? Prison Fc

teacher: students, tomorrow bring your parents to the open house. student one orphan: I don’t have any. student 2: what is the difference between you and an escaped prisoner. student one orphan: what! student 2: the prisoner gets picked.