Prison Jokes

What's the difference between my girlfriend and my uncle? my girlfriend didn't go to jail for loving me.

I may not be as "rich" as Donald Trump, but at least I am still allowed to go on holiday to Bali, Niagara Falls, Hong Kong, and the Pyramids of Giza. Orange Jesus can't travel to these places because these places cannot grant entry to felons.

...ah, who am I kidding? It's likely that Trump is going to prison, anyway.

Which word is also called for women's prison?

Pridaughter

Me going to jail for telling the orphan he has 363 days because mothers and Father’s Day

What happened to the man who made too many bad jokes? He served out a cruel and unusual PUNishment.

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

Me: Hi Jacob Jacob: Hi Me: your parents went to jail for littering when you were born Jacob: GOO GOO GAH GAH

why did the prisoner run away? to spit bars

Hillary Clinton lost last time to the first African American president, Barack Obama. Why will she lose this one to Donald Trump?

Because orange is the new black.

The warden is stronger than the ender dragon but WHY IS IT NOT A BOSS????

(doesnt have bossbar)

I'd hit you but if I did I'd go to jail for animal abuse

I got arrested because I cremated a guy. They said the guy had been alive when I burned him. I mean, it's an early cremation—what's the difference?

Today I went to the doctor for a test and he said I have 10 months to live. So later that day I stabbed him to death & the judge sentenced me for 15 years in prison. Problem solved

Judge: We shall now sentence you for the murder of your parents. Accused: Please consider a lenient sentence, your honour. Judge: But why? Accused: Because I’m an orphan. 🥱🫤

I wa finally released from jail a year after I beat up someone on New Year’s Eve. Don’t blame me for being suspicious of an Arabian counting down from ten.

What do you call the Gray Man in an electric chair? Fried Fish.

Did you hear on the news that a midget psychic broke out of jail? There is a small medium at large. (Pause For Laughter)

Pov: u go to Asian prison

U get served extra rice

A man is on his deathbed in prison by electric chair. The man who controls the chair asks for any last words. The prisoner reply’s with: “Can you hold my hand?”