Incarceration

Incarceration jokes

Coffee

    • I was making a coffee for my boss and this was the supposed recipe:

    1 egg 1 tomato diced bell peppers a bag of sugar sea salt coffee beans rusted nails.

    I got fired and spent the next 20 years in prison with a dude named Papa Bear.

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    • Jail

    • I don’t know why I’m in jail. So, basically, I was at a gun range, and we were supposed to hit the targets, even though I hit it.

    Prison

    • Why did the Puerto Rican American 🇺🇸 🇵🇷 that was a gay male 🇺🇸 🇵🇷 that was born physically challenged not say anything to a group of gay white men that were not physically challenged after they called him a size queen after the Puerto Rican American 🇺🇸 🇵🇷 that was born physically challenged was done taking turns giving them a blowjob and was done taking turns swallowing their sweet cum? 🇺🇸 🇵🇷

    Because it was the best meal that he ever had since he has been in prison for 30 years. 🇺🇸 🇵🇷

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    • Incarceration memes

    Rule

    • Elmo: Welcome to the new micronation of Tickelandia.

    Dude: Why are we close to Disneyland?

    Kid: I don't know.

    Elmo: Rule 1, you must not tell the forests or Bob Iger about us.

    Meanwhile, Officer: Come on, Elmo, you're going to prison.

    *Officer arrests Elmo*

    Elmo: But who wants tickles?

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    • Arrest

    • What do you say when you wake up to the police trying to arrest you?

    “C'mon, did ya really think I’d resist arrest?”

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    • Rape

    • Jack and Jill went up to an abandoned house.

    Jack drank too much and unzipped his fly. Jack said, "You know you wanna." Jill said, "No." So Jack locked both of them in the house and put a gag in Jill's mouth, tied her to a bed. He ripped off her dress and underwear. He took off his pants and his underwear too, then put on a condom. He then put a pill in her mouth and made her swallow. One minute later she was asleep. He took off her gag and mounted himself on her, then stuck his "candystick" in her mouth, next her fanny. Then his condom broke, but he was too drunk to notice. Nine months later a baby's born and Jack's in jail as the father.

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    • Braille

    • Why did the kid who was blind, in jail, need light to see? He didn't, he needed to braille his way out.

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    • Midget

    • I saw a midget prisoner climbing down a ladder the other day and I thought, huh, that's a little con-descending.

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    • Donald Trump

    • So Americans strongly worship Donald Trump, eh? Well, let's put that claim to the test by throwing him into the general population of Rikers Island.

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