Priest

Priest jokes

Bible

Why is the bible like a penis You get it forced down your throat by a priest

Finger

Why did the priest want to learn how to play the organ?

He wanted to be able to finger A minor.

Massage

What is an Italian massage?

An Italian Catholic priest giving a blowjob inside the confessional booth during Lent.

Child

A priest says to me, "Come up, my child." Then I said, "Do I know you? Because you're not my father."

Stripper

How do men like their women? Striped.

How does a priest like their children? Clean.

Why are most orphans strippers? They want to call someone mommy or daddy.

What is the difference between a stripper and candy? None. But they like it when you take the wrapper off.

Daddy

Why do I call my priest daddy?

Because he raped my mom when she was 13. She's 27 now.

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  • Orphan

    So I saw a bag full of children near a dumpster. I guess we know where the orphans are when the parents didn’t want them.

    Wouldn’t want to hope a Catholic priest comes along, otherwise the priest will have new sex toys.

    Baptism

    You should know it's important to wash your sex toys. That's why priests invented baptism.

    Confessional

    A Catholic gay male that is well-endowed goes to confession, and while he is inside the confessional booth, the Catholic priest is sucking his dick, and he says to the Catholic priest, "What are you doing, Father?"

    And the priest says, "It's called giving a blowjob."

    And the Catholic gay male says, "Why are you giving me a blowjob, Father, inside the confessional booth?"

    And the Catholic priest says, "If there was no glory hole in the confessional booth, my son, it would not be called a confessional booth in the first place."

    Satan

    Q: What do Satan and a priest have in common?

    A: They both love naughty souls.

    Religion

    What did the priest say during the christening?

    "So anyway, I started blasting!"

    Sport

    What’s a priest's favorite sport?

    Golf, because most of the holes are less than 18.

    Baby

    Where do babies get baptized?

    So the priest can wash their sex toys.