Priest jokes
What’s a reverse exorcism?
It’s when the demon tells the priest to get out of the child.
What turns green, purple, and white? A chameleon.
Why is the bible like a penis You get it forced down your throat by a priest
Why did the priest want to learn how to play the organ?
He wanted to be able to finger A minor.
A priest says to me, "Come up, my child." Then I said, "Do I know you? Because you're not my father."
What is an Italian massage?
An Italian Catholic priest giving a blowjob inside the confessional booth during Lent.
How do men like their women? Striped.
How does a priest like their children? Clean.
Why are most orphans strippers? They want to call someone mommy or daddy.
What is the difference between a stripper and candy? None. But they like it when you take the wrapper off.
What's a priest's favorite fruit?
Cantaloupe.
Why do I call my priest daddy?
Because he raped my mom when she was 13. She's 27 now.
House parties are like churches: there's always an underage kid getting fucked somewhere.
So I saw a bag full of children near a dumpster. I guess we know where the orphans are when the parents didn’t want them.
Wouldn’t want to hope a Catholic priest comes along, otherwise the priest will have new sex toys.
You should know it's important to wash your sex toys. That's why priests invented baptism.
A Catholic gay male that is well-endowed goes to confession, and while he is inside the confessional booth, the Catholic priest is sucking his dick, and he says to the Catholic priest, "What are you doing, Father?"
And the priest says, "It's called giving a blowjob."
And the Catholic gay male says, "Why are you giving me a blowjob, Father, inside the confessional booth?"
And the Catholic priest says, "If there was no glory hole in the confessional booth, my son, it would not be called a confessional booth in the first place."
What do priests give children?
Syphilis.
Why are priests so bad at racing? They are always in the 'little behind'.
What’s a priest's favorite sport?
Golf, because most of the holes are less than 18.
What did the priest say during the christening?
"So anyway, I started blasting!"
The priest had a very holy shirt.
Q: What do Satan and a priest have in common?
A: They both love naughty souls.
What's the difference between a Baptist and a rapist? The priests.