Politics jokes
I find it interesting that if you rearrange the letters in the word “Mother-in-law” you get the words “Woman Hitler”.
JFK was so popular he was banged in front of his Wife.
War isn't about who's right. It's about who's left.
Why is the Nazi Anthem banned in Germany? Because Horst Wessel lied.
When your gf tells you to treat her like a queen,
and then you remember you’re French.
I can’t remember if I already said this or not. I might have already said this. Also, this is a true story.
So, I’m walking into a store in Amish country, and there’s this guy with a bear trap. Then my mom’s friend says, "This guy’s gonna catch some bears." Then the Amish guy stops, looks around, and whispers, “It’s for democrats.”
Yo mama is Obama.
A guy walks up to me and says, "I wonder if the hookman is real?"
I reply saying, "Yeah, it's Asa Hutchinson, lol."
You can’t say “dwarf” anymore; you have to say “little people”.
You can’t say “fat”; you have to say “plus size”.
You can’t say “retard”; you have to say “democrat”.
"Do you know the Annoying Orange?"
"Yeah, they elected him before Biden!"
Why can’t you tell JFK facts about Dallas?
Last time he was there, he got his mind blown.
When I try to call my friend, I can't get through because my name is Lin Kon, and the operator keeps saying, "Yes, Mr. President."
Q: What is Hitler's least favorite grocery store?
A: Jew-Osco
Say what you want about Hitler, but in the end, he did kill Hitler.
Why didn't Donald Trump build the wall?
Because Mexicans did not and would not build the damn wall!
A Middle Eastern man comes to the states to do a stand up show. He starts by saying “2 Jews walk into a bar, NOT IN MY COUNTRY!”
The general proofreading Hitler's speeches was the original Grammar Nazi.
What does a crooked lawyer who is not on the ACLU payroll have in common with a crooked politician who has an office in Washington, DC?
They both sign their names using a blue pen 🖊 🖊.
How do you think Julius Caesar killed his enemies?..
With a pair of Caesars! 😂😂👌
Bill Clinton is no longer playing the saxophone.
He is now playing the whore-monica.