Politics

Politics jokes

Donald Trump

Why does Donald Trump love little boys? Because his hands look massive when he’s holding their tiny little prepubescent cocks.

Taliban

Drop me in Afghanistan with a Dodge Challenger Super Stock, a Mexican named Jose, a 6 pack of Dr. Pepper, a golden SCAR, a pack of chimichangas, and an M4A1, and I'll have the Taliban saying the Pledge of Allegiance in 4 hours.

Parachute

Francis Pope, Donald Trump, Barack Obama, and a little boy were on a falling airplane. There were 3 parachutes. Donald Trump grabs the first parachute and jumps off the plane saying, “The world needs my leadership!” Barack Obama grabs a parachute and says, “I need to help make choices for our world,” so he jumps off the plane. At this point, the Pope and the little boy are on the plane. The Pope says to the boy, “take the last parachute, I am too old and I’m going to die soon one day.” The little boy says, “actually there are two, you see, Donald Trump took my backpack.”

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  • Lover

    For all the talk of Donald Trump loving America, most of his lovers are imported from Eastern Europe.

    Lung

    I'm going to pull out your lungs faster than Joe Biden pulled troops out of Afghanistan.

    Election

    If Donald Trump is running against Bill Clinton, it's safe to say that we are witnessing the Lolita Express Erections...oops, I mean Elections.

    Wall

    Why did Trump decide to build the wall?

    Because China built a wall and they do not have any Mexicans.

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  • Assassination

    I was rooting for Donald Trump to be president.

    We haven't had a presidential assassination in a while.

    Trump

    Why didn't Trump beat Biden?

    Because he couldn't trump that bitch!

    Boundary

    What do Joe Biden and Russia have in common?

    Neither of them respect boundaries.

    Putin

    What is the difference between Putin and Hitler? Putin no longer supplies gas and Hitler gives it away for free.