Politics

Politics jokes

Car

What’s heavy, black, and can’t swim?

Ted Kennedy’s Oldsmobile Delmont 88 with Mary Jo Kopechne trapped inside.

Homeless

He's homeless.

Another: Oh he must be A "Sheer" (as in Andrew Scheer) survivor...

The other: No, he's a Liberal (as in Justin Trudeau) job hopeful.

Flag

How could the German people fall for Hitler and the Nazis?

There were an awful lot of red flags!

Memes

Trump

What did Darth Trump Vader say to evil emperor Putin?

"Yesssss Massager!"

President

God- make a grumpy old man president.

Angel- why?

G- cause I said so-name him Trump.

A- okay.

G- make him not pay taxes.

A- okay...

Fast forward to 2020

G- you know that grumpy old man?

A- yea...

G- make him create a deadly virus named after a beer.

A- Krona.

G- exactly.

A- why do you hate humans so much?

G- because I can.

Job

Why didn't the 6th of Jan go well? Cause the shitty Trump supporters didn't carry out the damn job correctly and let the president down. Also, hang Mike Pence!

Country

Germany does a backflip. America: What is happening?

France: Want a baguette?

USSR: Help!

Name

Instead of Obama, it was supposed to be Osama. Pretending I got their names mixed up.

Putin

Did you hear Biden went to the ER?

He's having a little trouble with his Putin.