9/10/01
Bush: “Ok, I got this. Just act surprised and pretend to be sad and declare war on Afghanistan.”
What’s the difference between Hitler and a bug?
Nothing.
I heard China aborts 25% of female babies. That's a lot of dead 3-year-old gender-affirmed girls.
What does Hitler's partner say when he begins?
"Hindin!"
If Hitler was a comedian, he would use laughing gas.
Arabs: WHO PUT THAT TOWER THERE... we must destroy it!
What do you get if you cross Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama? A blonde n1gger cunt.
People have been telling me that you can get things for free now.
The other day I saw a sign saying "FREE PALESTINE."
Charlene's hairline was so big that Joe Biden could not make it prime minister.
It looks like Kevin Magnussen finally got pole position.
He has the bragging rights that he took over Russia now.
Your hairline was so fat that Joe Biden could not make it prime minister.
Germany does a backflip. America: What is happening?
France: Want a baguette?
USSR: Help!
Obama, Trump, and Clinton are on the Titanic. The ship hits the iceberg and is going down.
Obama: "This is terrible! We've got to do something -- save the women and children!"
Trump: "Screw the women and children!"
Clinton: "Do you think we have time...?"
What do you call a Fuhrer who's also a fitness coach?
Adolf Fit-ler.
To teach kids about democracy, I let them vote on dinner. They picked tacos.
Then I made pizza because they don’t live in a swing state.
Why is America so bad at chess?
They lost both of their towers.
Abortion clinics are kind of like NAZI gas chambers. Less people come out than go in.
Me: "The villain has a point, you know."
Everyone else watching the WW2 documentary:
Why did America lose the chess match?
They were down 2 towers.
Why does Britain suck at chess?
They lost their queen.
