Politics jokes
What do you call the longest reigning monarch?
The queen? No, she dead.
When does a Pentagon have 4 sides? When it's intercepted by a plane.
Knock knock. Who's there? Colin! Colin who? Colonisation!
Just kidding, colonisers don't knock before they come in.
What do you call a blind Nazi?
A Not-See!
What would Hitler be called if he abused women? Hither!
Q: How do you know when someone is an opposition leader to Putin?
A: When they are falling from their balcony.
Q: How do you know when Putin is lying?
A: His lips move.
The sexy towers are just like my sexy toes because when I crashed a plane into the tower, it burned and bled.
What do you say to the USA after 9/11? Checkmate.
Why does America have more guns than people?
What's the only type of abortion Republicans will never try to legislate against?
A school shooting.
What's the only type of abortion Republicans will never do anything to prevent?
A school shooting.
Imagine if Joe Biden was elected for a second term.
He would be the first president to be assassinated by a slick bathtub.
Did you hear Biden went to the ER?
He's having a little trouble with his Putin.
I don’t see what the problem is.
The Supreme Court came up with a solution to the tampon shortage, yet all the liberals are pissed!
Why don't communists like Microsoft? Because it's Minecraft instead of ourcraft.
Why are Americans so bad at chess?
Because they have already lost 2 towers!
The S in America stands for safe.
Who is Osama Bin Laden’s secret cousin? Barack Obama or Barack Osama Bin Laden?
When your gf tells you to treat her like a queen,
and then you remember you’re French.