somebody called the cops for a school shooting, what a snitch
What's black and white and red all over?
A police brutality case.
"Yes, officer! It was a requirement to run over that child. It matched perfectly with the beat drop!"
what did the woman do when the armed police officer raped her?
freeze
A police officer came up to me and said just why why would you bring the epileptic children to a laser tag fight
What's the difference between a Pig and a Police officer.
The Pig smells better
So i told the officer
I cant even walk when Im sober
A white woman was caught on video using racial slurs and assaulting two black students she was charged with Interpreting black police officer
Kid: *runs down the street* HELP ME Officer: you ok kid? Me: dont worry! hes my nephew, there was a big spider Officer: oh ok ma'am *walks off* When officer leaves: Me: *gets whip* what did I say about leaving the basement
What do orphans and police not have in common
The police can actually go home
what happens when a battery commits a crime? they get charged!
"Cop: I'm arresting you for downloading the entire Wikipedia." Man: "Wait! I can explain everything!"
Man 1: Hey I heard you survived a school shooting, what was it like? Man 2: People were screaming and running everywhere, I was only able to get a few of them.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
What did the cops say when someone called him racist?
How can I be racist my wife’s eye is black
An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Or at least it does if you throw it hard enough.
Why is it that if you donate a kidney, people love you. But if you donate five kidneys, they call the police.
My senior relatives liked to tease me at weddings, saying things like, “You’ll be next!” They stopped once I started doing the same to them at funerals.
Two priests are driving down a road when they are pulled over by the cops.
The cop shines a light in their faces and signals to the driver to roll down his window.
"We're searching for two child molesters," he says.
The driver leans over to the other priest and they whisper between themselves.
Finally, he turns back to the policeman. "Ok. We'll do it."
A cop pulls a man over and finds out hes drunk. So he asks for license and registration, and the drunk man says ̈Can i see your flashlight? ̈ and the cop says ̈just give me your license and registration. ̈ so drunk guy says ̈not until you give me your flashlight. ̈ the cop said ̈for what? ̈ and the drunk guy says ̈so i can shine it in your face and see what an asshole looks like. ̈
A turtle is crossing the road when he’s mugged by two snails. When the police show up, they ask him what happened. The shaken turtle replies, “I don’t know. It all happened so fast.”
Why did the orphan commit a bank robbery?
So he could be wanted.
