An emo tried to high-five a tree.
It left him hanging.
Plant Jokes
What did one nut say to the other?
“Cashew later.”
What did the baby corn say to the mama corn? Where's popcorn?
I hate long plants. They make me Ivysaur. Hahahahahahaha Pokemon!
Yo mama so stupid she thought seaweed was something fish smoke.
What do you call a nervous zucchini?
An edgy veggie.
What did the bee say to the flower?
"Hey bud! When do you open?"
What did the big tree say to the little one? Grow a pear!
What was the oak tree's response to the apple tree's joke?
You should leaf it alone!
If a tree could be any animal, what would it be?
Answer: A dog because of its bark lol. 😀
Why did the dwarf laugh when he walked on the field?
The grass was tickling his balls.
Why couldn't the carrot go to his friend's house?
Because he was grounded.
Do you like tree jokes? Because they leaf me in tears!
I like plants, but then I decided to turn over a new leaf and branch out.
If my cat were a cactus, doesn't that make him the catus?
Humpty Dumpty fell off the wall, his mom did a terri-fried call.
He got hurt in a egg-cident, and it never got eggs-elent.
When the eggs-plant was over, he got told to use the mower.
It happened too fast, he watched the very last.
Next he died, eaten all fried.
Bean.
What is the difference between a hoe's birth Daddy and her pimp Daddy?
The first daddy plants the seed in a cunt, and the second reaps the harvest from the cunt.
What is a room you can not enter?
A mushroom.
1. What do you call a dinosaur that is sleeping?
A dino-snore!
2. What is fast, loud, and crunchy?
A rocket chip!
3. Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert?
Because she was stuffed!
4. What has ears but cannot hear?
A cornfield!
5. What did the left eye say to the right eye?
Between us, something smells!