Person jokes
My mom said the happier a person is when sick, the sooner they get better.
So I went to the hospital, hooked up everyone's breathing masks to laughing gas.
What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender.
What's all fuzzy, warm, and laughing? The person who snapped its neck and put it into the blender.
what do you call a shadow stalker REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Why can't a blind person eat fish?
They can't see food.
What's the best comeback for a person calling you an orphan?
Kill their parents.
Memes
What do you call a disabled person who gets high?
Baked potato.
An emo tried to give me a high five...
I left him hanging.
What does an apple and suicidal person have in common?
They're both hanging from a tree.
Person 1: “Hey, today was great!”
Person 2: “What happened?”
Person 1: “I ran into my ex today.”
Person 2: “What’s so great about that?”
Person 1: “I was in my car.”
What do you call a person with no arms?
Armless.
No, it's harmless.
How do you make a blind person jealous? You ask if it's a nice day out.
What's a dying person's least favorite app? TikTok.
Person A: What do you call the dangly bit of an octopus?
Person B: Tentacles?
Person A: Ok *tickles person B ten times*
If someone burns to death, do they get a discount at the crematorium?
What kind of bath bomb does an emo person use?
A toaster.
Sometimes I get jealous when I see a gravestone.
What do a blind person and an orphan have in common?
They both cannot see their family.
Nobody: Aww, that's so sad!
Me: Just like me.
Asians love it when a British person says "Rice!"
If you want KFC, pour water on a poor person outside our restaurant and film it.