Performance jokes
What’s the name of the band in the gay bar?
A: Beers for Queers.
Did you hear about the guy who died by lethal injection and writhed on the stretcher for 20 minutes?
I guess it really IS all in the execution.
Why did the rapper bring a basketball to the concert?
To drop some SLAM DUNKS on the mic!
If Joe Biden was on stage and he heard gunshots, he probably would’ve thought it was the ice cream truck.
There was a magician on board the Titanic and said that he could make anything disappear.
Once the ship had gone down one of the passengers said to him, "Go on, so what did you do with the ship then?"
Veronica fine af tho
What did the rapper say to the microphone?
"You're my closet confidant!"
Q: I have a fish that can breakdance! A: Only for 20 seconds though, and only once.
What do you call a white guy who can actually dance? Jewish.
What do you call a heterosexual man performing fellatio on another heterosexual man?
Bisexual.
What did the rapper say when he broke his mic?
"Looks like I dropped the mic... literally!"
I was anonymous with the previous jokes. I will now go by "I can fly! *falls*."
What's black and white and red all over? A mime I hit with my car.
What is David Bowie known for when making music? He gets his beats from his kids.
Why was the rapper always on time?
Because they had mad flow!
Using modern day technology you can produce music with a Tesla coil. I don't know if you heard it, but it is quite shocking and even electrifying. I can't tell if it is metal or techno, but it is more valuable than joules. It really amps up your blood pressure and has you saying watt the whole time. It is way better than current music.
Dude, Mississippi got a better K/D ratio than you.
What is harder than steel?
Michael Jackson on a primary school oval. 😂
Why did the moth nibble a hole in the carpet?
He wanted to see a floor show.
"Banjo players spend half their lives tuning... and the other half out of tune."
I'm a banjo picker, and I can confirm this is 99% true.
I want to be a pornstar. Even if I completely suck, they will still give me a firm raise.
What sound does a nut make when it comes alive?
Christmas!