Performance jokes
What sound does a nut make when it comes alive?
Christmas!
If Joe Biden was on stage and he heard gunshots, he probably would’ve thought it was the ice cream truck.
Why did the rapper climb a ladder during his performance?
He wanted to take his career to the NEXT LEVEL!
What's Whitney Houston's favorite type of coordination?
HAAAAAANNNNDDDDEEEEEEYYYYEEEEEE!
What did the magician do as a trick in his show?
Make your doubts about magic... DISAPPEAR!
Here you go
Why did the man die of the actor's performance?
The performance was unbeLIVEable!
What’s a rapper’s favorite type of SHOE?
Ad-lib-idas.
How does a rapper start a race?
With a ready, set, FLOW!
Well, I saw a stripper, and she was trying out bread.
Why did the alien go to the rap battle?
Because he had some UNEARTHLY rhymes!
I just had the worst gig of my life! I told yo mama jokes at the orphanage.
Why don’t rappers ever get lost?
They always have a SICK FLOW to follow.
Have you seen the inside of Ford's Theatre? It will blow your mind. ~Abraham Lincoln
How does a woman scare a gynecologist?
By becoming a ventriloquist.
Why did the rapper go to school?
To master the art of RAP-LETICS!
Dude, Mississippi got a better K/D ratio than you.
I played piano at a Worthmore disabled elderly center. Then after I was done, I said, "How about you give me a standing ovation?"
I regret it to this day. Now I am forced to live here at Worthmore, and sit on my wheelchair, sad and lonely.
What does Michael Jackson say when he grabs his crotch? I never noticed that before.
A Chelsea fan called Timo Werner on his phone to encourage him during his bad form. Timo Werner still missed all the calls.
Did you hear about the actor who fell through the floorboard?
Don't worry, he was just going through a stage.